9. You try to convince household appliances into morphing into crossbows and other weapons of war.

8. Whenever you spot a pretty *chit* (as Morte would say) you go ask her what happened to her tail and/or wings.

7. You attempt to vigorously debate your boss out of existence.

6. You hire an army of exterminators to wipe out the rat population in your neighborhood.

5. You hear gibbering, cursing and blathering coming from another room. You go in expecting a huge mass of talking heads...when in fact it is only someone watching "The Jerry Springer Show".

4. You worship an old rag doll in public expecting a lady wearing cutlery on her head to arrive but are confused when she doesn't.

3. You complain bitterly to your friends that you were never able to visit Pandemonium and Gehenna.

2. You watch the game credits 30 times to write down all of the cast member's names.